WHERE DID THEY HIDE THE QUIET?

I went to the local Barnes and Noble for the second time this month to research Home Designs in the many magazines published today on the subject. Its seems that every time i visit this particular store i'm barraged with a never ending cycle of disruptions by one entity or another. The last time i was there the chief protagonists were special needs children running amuck throughout the store. Before you think of me as an insensitive monster, know that I love the fact that a book store is on their visit list; i just believe that special needs or not they should be properly supervised to insure that they don't bother other patrons. The disruptions of the latest visit couldn't have been planned better by the most twisted of screen writers. I reveled in the fact that I got there early and that the place was only occupied by a few people, but that sense of elation was short lived. Immediately after gathering my magazines and sitting down at a table isolated from foot traffic, a woman made a B line directly towards me; pushing past countless empty tables before dropping her personal bags noisily onto the table next to mine. She then proceeded to side step the clear path to the seat on the other side of the table, and she stood directly in front of me with her fat miss-shapened ass 1' away from my face while she slowly removed her coat scarf and sweater. I kept my composure and only left after she sat down and pulled out her cell phone. I left the second table after a young girl of 8 or 9 began to pace around the adjacent table with what sounded like tap shoes on a wooded floor. The strange thing is she was wearing what looked like sneakers and the floor was carpeted. I believe that she was wearing one of the brilliant new inventions marketed for children these days (shoes that make noise and light up with each step), just what the world needs most. The third and final location really took the proverbial cake. The disruptions started with the restocking lady dragging her plastic footstool back and forth across the same 2 feet of floor as she re-racked magazines that were left in the isles by the lazy and the privileged. The situation quickly progressed when another worker started running a vacuum cleaner in symphony with her scrapping stool noises over a no larger area of carpet in the same vicinity. If you believe it stopped there you're sadly mistaken. A cloaked and hooded 20 something 'Y.O.' man sat down beside me with music seeping out of his earbuds as he grunted out incoherent rap lyrics. The final straw came when a woman sat next to me, pulled out her cell phone and proceeded to order what seemed to be a membership to AARP. She gave and spelt out her name, complete address, birthdate, phone number, and a barrage of other personal information. She then made it clear that she wanted to pay by money order. My guess is the last phone call of this nature that she made left her without Credit. All the while abrasive music play loudly on the overhead speakers. Remember the day when an older lady with horn rimmed glasses went around shushing anyone who dared to raised their voice above a whisper with threats of expulsion, how I long for those days. I really don't expect a completely quiet environment free from verbal interaction between people, or the occasional quick and quiet cell phone call; but loud and abrasive disruptions as afore mentioned should be unacceptable by anyones standards. Next time I'll try Borders.